3 x new poems performed at Freed Up

Dear all;

Here are three x new poems as performed at Freed Up Poets,
Manchester last week!

BRIAN LIKES TO POKE THE BEAR

Brian likes to poke the bear
with a little white stick.

Brian likes to poke the bear
and pull big faces at it
before calling it thick.

Brian likes to poke the bear
and he boasts it is scared of him
before again taking the mick.

Brian likes to poke the bear
before giving it a big hard stare.

Brian likes to poke the bear
but when the bear snarls at him
then cries out 'THAT'S NOT FAIR'



BLAIR'S MEGADETH BURGER

I couldn't believe it
when I read on
the internet
It was probably
the hottest
takeaway
In the world.


I couldn't believe it
when I read on
the internet
it's burgers
were reportingly
so spicey
it was recommended
you wore rubber
gloves
when you ate one.

What was it's
secret ingredent
I asked myself
to make it so hot
it would almost
make your fingers
melt
if you tried
to eat one
without wearing
rubber gloves.


STOLEN BIKINI

You say you cannot believe
somebody stole your wallet
and used your credit cards
to buy two machine guns
and three automatic pistols.


You say you cannot believe
somebody stole your wallet
and used your credit cards
to buy some explosives
and some designer sunglasses.

You say you cannot believe
somebody stole your wallet
and used your credit cards
to buy a bikini from H & M


And then post it to you
from Brazil
once it had being worn.


(Image borrowed from
http://api.ning.com/files/lZ4SC6CFu36xzkxEm*8RoDBzsJ*hSgzPGOADVEdzh49w-XV0RiMX51rr-0oiTajn-uc09G902TUx878BwCnq0lMDSI6xG4Ah/poetry.gif)